2005-01-23 - 10:39 p.m.

just dug up the mp3 for teenage wasteland (the who). prolly ill listen to it all night, dream about it, then never listen to it again because i am like that you know.
didnt dream about anything last night. of course not.
havent seen winnie since last year. was supposed to go to a party for her bfriend last night but there was a snow storm and i dont do snow, and the weather was too bad for her to pick me up anyway. and the busses werent running on schedule. its better that way. i didnt want to meet him anyway.
right. so i was supposed to start school last week. and i fucking didnt go. thats right. i just plain didnt leave the damn house. i am a fucking mess. i think i can get out of this mess if i go tomorrow and apologize to every professor and never miss another class again. and there is absolutly no reason i cant do that.
of all the things ive ever done to myself, this is the one that makes me go, you know what, lara, you have a very serious problem. something is just not right. fine so there's a problem. what to do? go to your damn classes.
i dont have anything else to say right now.

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